Monday, June 13, 2011

If Putin Was My Boyfriend...


He would listen to my mother's complaints about the rising costs of sausages at the local grocery store and make a visit himself to the store in order to humilate the executive in charge

The result would be two-fold:  my mother is would say this guy is a keeper and we would never pay for meat again.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

If Putin Was My Boyfriend...


He would invite me to charity galas filled with Hollywood celebrities and dedicate an oldie or two to me.

Is there anything this man can't do?

Monday, June 6, 2011

If Putin Was My Boyfriend...


He would teach me the difference between the genitive and dative cases in Russian. 

Heck if I know when those things are supposed to be used!

Sunday, June 5, 2011

If Putin Was My Boyfriend...

He'd let me borrow his Volga when he was out of town.

The chauffeur would be optional.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

If Putin Was My Boyfriend...

On date night, he'd close Red Square to the public and take me for a romantic meal in Lenin's Mausoleum, just the three of us, and enchant me with stories from his days as a KGB agent.

How romantic!

Friday, June 3, 2011

Why would you want Putin to be your boyfriend?


I get asked this question a lot.  As such, I decided to start this blog to begin to explain the many reasons why I think that Vladimir Putin would make the perfect boyfriend. 

A few important things to keep in mind when reading this blog: 

1) I have never actually met Putin, so I have no way to verify that my fantasies about how awesomely powerful and cool this man is are really true.  The closest we might have come to meeting was back in the summer of 2004, as I was standing on the streets on St. Petersburg as his cavalcade would go rushing by.  Of course, that also could have been a visiting dignitary from Tajikistan.  How would I know?

2) I am not a Russian journalist.  If I was, I'd probably think that Putin was a bastard.

3) I am not Russian.  I am an American captivated by this man's ability to hold power.

4) You should have figured this out by now, but I am also not Dmitry Medvedev.  Nor am I Lyudmila Putina, the luckiest woman alive.   

5) Perhaps because of my strange ideas about what types of men are attractive, I remain single.  If you are the ruler of a rather large and powerful country, you should send me a pic and maybe we can go out for drinks. 

6) I expose my longing for your entertainment.  Putin, my dear, if you do find your way here, drop me a line.